


rerun

by SKRMIX



Series: loop [1]
Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, M/M, Robin Suffers, Time Loop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-03
Updated: 2020-08-28
Packaged: 2021-03-06 01:01:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25684711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SKRMIX/pseuds/SKRMIX
Summary: Robin wakes up in that field again.
Relationships: Chrom/My Unit | Reflet | Robin
Series: loop [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900792
Comments: 27
Kudos: 84





	1. Chapter 1

Robin wakes up to the warmth of the sun on his face and the softness of the grass below him.  
  
And this is all wrong again.  
  
He waits for the soft voices of his friends, or soon be friends, to come once again, "Chrom! We gotta do something!" and "What do you propose we do?" and that's Robin's cue to open his eyes slowly to adjusting to the light before he sees the familiar face of Chrom smiling down at him. "Hey there, here, take my hand." And Robin does so, like all the other times he has.   
  
Robin follows along after they've introduce themselves, Chrom as ever is trusting so quickly followed by his sister Lissa as both royals smile at him with open arms and Fredrick of course is weary as ever.  
  
"Don't mind Fredrick, once you get to know him he can be very mother like." Chrom whispers not to quietly at Robin along side the dirt road to south town, Fredrick's eyebrows twitch from where he walks beside Lissa and Robin can't help but let out a small breathless laugh. Yes, he knows, he's seen that side of Fredrick many times before and how deeply he cares for all of his friends, including Robin himself.  
  
Almost like a script, south town plays out like the other times, Chrom running off with Fredrick quickly following behind then Lissa soon after, Robin knows by heart where the brigand will stand to swing his axe down on Lissa and he quickly saves her.   
  
Then the rest of the script plays out like before, Chrom and Lissa thanking Robin for helping save her and the other villagers, Chrom suggesting Robin be his tactician again and the group heading to Ylisstol to meet with Emmeryn and the rest of the Shepard's, Maribelle getting kidnapped then saved and Gangrel yelling out the act of war when Emmeryn refuses the Fire Emblem once again.  
  
It isn't long until they head to Regna Ferox to ask for aid, fight in the tournament and win, head back to Ylisstol when news of Emmeryn getting attacked and kidnapped once again and the dreadful scene of her body falling from atop the pillar she stands on.   
  
Robin watches this all play out, he knew this would happen, maybe if he had tried he could have avoided all these events in the first place.   
  
So when the mad king himself with the levin sword in hand, it takes Robin off guard when instead of attacking Chrom like before, Gangrel swings his sword at Robin instead and the lighting that ripples through his body is so very painful. As Robin falls to his knees, he can faintly hear Chrom screaming like he had done for his sister at the pillar, his vision starts to blur and blacken as Gangrel falls and Chrom kneeling by his side and yelling for Lissa.  
  
But Robin knows it's too late, instead he smiles up at Chrom, they've hadn't been close in this run but the way he's holding him soothes him all the same. "I'm sorry." Robin breathes out one last time and Chrom's sobbing is the last thing he hears before darkness takes him.  
  
Robin wakes up in that field again.

00

  
' _This time, I'll protect them all_.' Robin thinks to himself after meeting Emmeryn for the nth time again, she smiles kindly at him like always and Robin will protect her smile for Chrom and the rest of her people.   
  
Robin works hard for the next few weeks, training the Shepard's, keeping an close eye on Emmeryn, patrolling the castle and walking through the garden's to try and figure out where the assassin that tries to attack Chrom the night of the invasion came in through.  
  
Almost a month goes by when Chrom walks up behind Robin, startling the poor man while putting a hand onto his shoulder. "Whoa! Sorry, didn't mean to startle you." the prince chuckles sheepishly, "Ah, no, it's my fault. I wasn't paying attention, sorry." Robin apologizes with a bow of his head, "Did you need something?" Robin questions with a slight tilt of his head as he peers up at his closest friend, well, to him anyways, even if they aren't now, they'll slowly get to know one another again like all the other runs.   
  
"Oh! Uh- No- I was worried, since you've been working a lot lately." Chrom offers a smile, "Are you alright?"   
  
"I-" Robin hesitates to answer, should he tell Chrom all of that he knows? What if he's accused of being a spy, or the fact that even if he did tell anyone, no one would possibly believe him. Realizing he hasn't responded, Robin offers a smile back to the prince in front of him. "Ah, no, I'm fine. I just.. really like your elder sister, I wouldn't want any harm to her is all." Robin would do anything for Chrom and trying to save his sister is one of the many promises he's made to him, to this man he loves.  
  
"Oho? You like Emm, huh? I didn't see that coming." Chrom laughs at Robin when he sputters and flushes while shaking his head, "Nono! I-I didn't mean it like that! I swear!" Chrom laughs harder when Robin covers his face in embarrassment.   
  
"No worries friend, I know. I was just teasing you." Chrom pats the other while chuckling, "But yeah, I should be working hard like you are now, I mean, I love my sister to death, I would spare my own life for hers or Lissa's." Chrom smiles to himself while nodding. Robin smiles back, yes, Chrom would spare his life for Emmeryn's or Lissa's or just about anyone's really. Robin has seen more then once Chrom getting stabbed and bleeding out in order to protect someone, this man standing in front of him would be proud of how he grows up to be.  
  
"Well, anyways, would you be interested in sparring? Aha, none of the other's wont spar with me, er, rather, I tend to break things during." Chrom sheepishly scratches the back of his head with a small blush covering his face.   
  
"Oh? I need to see this in person." Robin teases while walking over to the exit of the gardens before looking back at Chrom over his shoulder, "And I won't hold back."  
  
"I swear it's not that bad! And I won't hold back either." Chrom quickly catches up to Robin while laughing.   
  


* * *

  
"Holy crap you guys!" Lissa rushes through the doors of the stables where everyone is, Fredrick soon following behind her with a stern face. "What's going on?" Chrom is quick to catch on when Fredrick doesn't scold Lissa for her language, Robin watches from where he sits while the knight informs Chrom of what has happened, he knows what happened even as the three are whispering to one another away from the now concerned group and no matter how much Robin tries, Maribelle's kidnapping always happens one way or another.   
  
Robin knows how it'll play out, but he plans it out in front of Chrom to not seem suspicious, after informing the Shepard's of Maribelle's kidnapping they all go to the borders along with Emmeryn, with much protest from Chrom and Lissa, Robin included though he doesn't say it aloud, knowing that her grace will go either way.   
  
"I suspect something will happen while we're here," Robin explains to Chrom while showing and pointing at the map laid on the table while Chrom tries to follow along, "Sumia and I will fly here." Robin moves the wooden piece to where he knows Maribelle would be. "Then you will follow out the rest of the plan." Robin finishes.   
  
"Are you certain that a battle will play out?" Chrom's eyes scan over the map once again before looking up across to Robin who stands on the other side of the table. "Yes, I am certain."   
  
Then like the other runs, Gangrel declares war, Robin saves Maribelle with the aid of Sumia, Chrom leading out the plan Robin had laid out the previous night and Emmeryn is safe.  
  


* * *

  
"Robin." Emmeryn's soft voice snaps Robin out of his thoughts as he sits alone in the gardens, quickly standing from the bench he was seated on Robin bows. "Ah, hello your grace." Robin flushes when she softly laughs, "May I sit with you?" Emmeryn smiles at him waiting for an answer. "Oh! Of course." Robin smiles back almost nervously. He's never actually spent time alone with her before in the other runs.  
  
As she waves off her guard to leave them be for a bit, she gracefully sits before motioning Robin to do the same, the silence is peaceful between them both as they look at the sea of flowers around them.  
  
"Chrom speaks highly of you." Emmeryn's soft voice breaks the silence while she turns her attention to Robin beside her, "Chrom does? I haven't done anything to deserve.." Robin looks at his gloved hands while a small blush creeps over his face. Softly laughing again, Emmeryn speaks again, "I know we've just met, but I would like to ask a favour of you." She places a gentle hand atop Robin's as he meets her gaze, "Oh, okay." He tries to return the smile.  
  
"I have this feeling, but, I will not say." Emmeryn's other hand curls in her lap, "But please, look after my younger siblings." She finishes while turning her attention back to the garden.   
  
Robin doesn't say anything while he remembers her death at the pillars, even while falling she had a soft smile on her face.  
  
"I promise I will do my best." Robin says after awhile with determination laced in his voice.  
  
Emmeryn smiles at him once more.  
  
Though, Robin will protect Chrom even if Emmeryn hadn't asked.  


* * *

  
The invasion had happened suddenly and Robin didn't know why, it wasn't supposed to happen until a few weeks later, the assassin that was supposed to distract Chrom had never came and it wasn't until the sounds of someone screaming had alerted the others and soon a battle had formed.   
  
Dreading the worse, Robin quickly pulled Chrom along to where Emmeryn's chambers laid, battling their way there, they had come across the horrible scene of Emmeryn.  
  
The battle had ended when Fredrick had entered the room to inform Chrom and Robin both before his eyes land on Emmeryn's form.  
  
Robin doesn't know how this happened, Emmeryn's dead corpse lays on the floor of her chambers, her lifeless eyes stare back at Robin while the rest of her is a mangled mess, a brutal way to die and she never deserved this. Lissa's sobs on the other side of the closed doors demanding to let her see her sister as Maribelle, Sumia and Sully try to soothe her with comforting words and sobs of their own.  
  
Chrom wouldn't let Lissa see the horrid state Emmeryn was left in, he could barely look at her himself but even now, as he's kneeling next to her on the floor with his tears staining his face, his trembling hands clasped around her cold ones, he maintains his gaze before closing hers forever.  
  
From the corner of his eye, Robin spots the familiar colours of the assassin outside the windows of the door that leads out to the balcony of Emmeryn's chambers and without thinking Robin throws himself in front of Chrom to take the hit meant for the prince instead. ' _Poison_.' Robin thinks as he falls to the ground, Fredrick in the background fighting off the fiend while Chrom panics at the paling of Robin's skin and small breaths that comes out from his tactician on the floor, dying too, just like his sister."R-Robin! no- this can't be!" Glove hands move to Robin, though he can't feel anything as the poison quickly spreads.   
  
As voices mix and blur together in the background, Robin's hazy eyes stare back at Emmeryn's closed ones before he does the same and smiles. Next time, he will try harder.  
  
Robin wakes up in that field once again.


	2. Chapter 2

This time Robin makes it pass the fight with Gangrell, the mad king screams and cries out danming Chrom and Robin himself until he takes his final breath and his body falls limp onto the blood soaked ground. Robin turns to face Chrom, to cheer with him and maybe even be bold enough to confess his feelings towards the man but when Sumia runs up to him with a smile and Chrom's own smile on his face as he lifts and spins her as they both laugh, Robin decides to return back to the others to make sure that everyone is okay.  
  
It's not that he hadn't expected this, no he's seen Chrom marry different woman before in the other runs, the children he and his wife have though, he can't remember anything pass that point like their faces and names since it's been too long since he's seen anything pass the fight with Gangrell.   
  
So when the war is over and peace is spread over the land Robin busies himself with about anything he can think of. He and Chrom had gotten close in this run and it's been awhile since Robin had this close bond with the now Exalt, Robin wouldn't lie but he misses him in more ways then one.  
  
The wedding it self was beautiful like all the other ones Robin's attended, Chrom standing with his wife of choosing and tears up when he sees his wife and during the opening of his vows, yes, Robin knows all too well the words Chrom's speaks by heart now.   
  
The couple kiss once the Priest blesses them, Lissa a crying mess because, 'you go big bro, I knew you could get her!' and the rest of the Shepard's whistling and cheering at the now blushing Chrom and Sumia. Robin thinks he cries too and doesn't deny when everyone around him coos and laughs at him because he is so happy for his best friends even though it is far from the truth.   
  
So when Regna Ferox calls for a meeting, Robin suddenly remembers bits of pieces of what is going to happen.  
  
"We should ask Plegia for aid." Robin suggests as the meeting happens, heads turn and eyes are set on him while he shrugs, "They have enough ships for us to take out men to Valm, it's probably out best course of action. Ah, but if anyone has any other options, please tell." Robin scans the room for anyone to speak and when none do he smiles. "Okay then."   
  
When the meeting is over and everyone spills out the room, Flavia claps an arm around Robin's shoulders while laughing loudly, "Your tone of voice had this, 'anyone who speaks against my plans shall die.' ring to it." The older woman laughs again when Robin rolls his eyes at her. "Well, Robin does have that affect to it." Chrom is suddenly standing near them smiling in greeting.   
  
Robin avoids his look while pushing the older woman off him, "We should send the letter right away." Robin tries to move pass but Flavia beats him to the door, "Don't worry your little head off, I got this." And off she goes.  
  
"I should probably go too." Robin turns to leave again but a hand stops him, trailing his eyes up Robin meets Chrom's concerned eyes that are filled with hurt. "Have I done something to upset you? You seem.. distant towards me and I want to apologize if I had done anything to upset you." Chrom's voice falls near the end of his sentence. Robin blinks, Chrom shouldn't be apologizing for anything, in fact it should be Robin himself apologizing on how he's been acting. He's been avoiding Chrom because of this petty jealousy that's been there for years, yet it always hurts to watch Chrom be married off even if Robin knows this.   
  
Heart broken, Robin lets out a long sigh before shaking his head, "No, you haven't upset me or done anything. I just.." Robin trails off, adverting his gaze while he contemplates on what he's going to say and when Chrom waits with pleading eyes, Robin sighs once more. "At your wedding, I had fallen deeply in love with, er, this person and for so long I've been pinning for them, so when I had a chance to confess I seen the way they look at another. So when you got married, I wanted that too. I'm sorry, this is selfish and stupid." Robin laughs bitterly at himself.  
  
Gods, he feels stupid for admitting this, Chrom and himself married? What ajoke.  
  
"It's not selfish or stupid, if you're still moping after all this time then you surely had strong affections towards this person. I respect that." Chrom gently smiles at Robin while pulling him into an embrace before continuing, "I'm sure one day, if they ever come back or are still around, you'll get your chance once again so keep a look out on them." Chrom smiles down at his friend while squeezing him lightly, "They are still around, right?" Chrom whispers while leaning in.  
  
"Well, duh." Robin laughs for the first time in awhile, being with Chrom like this makes him happy inside, even if he can't have him here, there's always another chance, maybe. "Ohh? And who is this lucky person?" Chrom grins while jabbing Robin's side, "I'm not telling you. It's a secret." Robin huffs while returning the jab, "But maybe one day, I'll tell you." Robin smiles at the taller, yes one day he will tell Chrom how he feels, but not now.  
  


* * *

  
  
"Walhart's forces will fight to the death if they have to." Robin's calm voice explains while moving the markers on the map in front of him. He's seen this all before so this is no surprise to him while Chrom can't quite get the thought in his head. "But for what..?" the Exalt exhales before rubbing at his temples. "How are you so calm about this whole situation?" Chrom looks over at Robin who just keeps his eyes on the map.  
  
"... I've seen this before." Robin confesses without saying the whole truth, he's battled Walheart before, long ago and he had won in the end. This time though, Robin will make sure they come out as the victors in the end.  
  
"You must have seen everything by now, even before we've met." Chrom muses while looking over the map once again. Chrom doesn't even know the extent of his comment while Robin thinks about the past experiences and deaths he's seen and felt himself.   
  
"I suppose you're right." Robin hums while moving a marker piece to one end of the map. "Chrom, I'll have you here." Robin moves a piece of wood to the second forces for back up if needed. "What? Why? Shouldn't I be up here with you?" Chrom moves a hand to where the main forces of his army will be, and next to the marker where Robin had placed himself.   
  
"I want you to stay back, it's for your safety." Robin simply says even when the Exalts eyes look over at him with confusion before his temper rises, "For my safety? You're starting to sound like Fredrick," Chrom scoffs, "I will be up there with you, we're supposed to be in this together. I can't just stay back." Chrom states while his gaze bores into Robin.   
  
Robin grits his teeth, this is for Chrom's safety and his own good. Chrom doesn't know the extent that Walheart will go to just to see Chrom's head on a stick. Chrom doesn't know that they'll most likely to lose in this battle ahead and capture most of the army, if Chrom can flee before the capture..  
  
"I'm coming and that's final." Chrom breathes out while his expression doesn't falter one bit.   
  
"Chrom please! I'm trying to protect you! If all things fail and you get captured with the rest of us.. I-I love you too much for that to happen and-" Robin cuts himself off while staring in horror at his own words.   
  
Robin's mask breaks for a split second, how could he have been so stupid to have let one little sentence to escape his lips?  
  
"I.. I meant, I love you as a friend. You are a dear friend of mine." Robin tries to back petal while Chrom stares at him with an unreadable expression on his face, it's no use, the damage had been done. "I'll leave now. I'm sorry." Robin tries not to let his voice betray his feelings, this man standing in front of him who had broken his heart plenty of times even if this man isn't the original one, from the first time to now, but even so, he loves this man who had only showed him kindness and trust.  
  
"Robin.. you-" Chrom's hand flies forwards, his grip clasped around the others wrist to keep Robin in place but no words come out as both stare at each other in silence.   
  
"..." Robin's eyes trail down to where Chrom's grip doesn't let go before looking back up at blue eyes, "I- You- You can't just say.." Chrom hardens his gaze on him before continuing, "How long?" Chrom questions.  
  
' _How long_?' Robin repeats the words in his head, how long has he been in love with Chrom? How long has he had these feelings towards him? Is it an understatement to say all of his life, ever since the first run, ever since Chrom had held out his hand for him in that field that one day?   
  
"Since the beginning." Robin closes his eyes in fear of what he'll see in the others expression. He can't lie to Chrom, not now not ever.   
  
"That long..?" Chrom whispers as his grip loosens on the other before falling to his side. "Then, when you spoke of the wedding and.." his voice trails off along with his eyes, looking anywhere but at Robin in front of him.   
  
"... I'm sorry." Robin finishes before turning to leave, as he does his heart breaks even more when Chrom doesn't follow and letting him go.  
  


* * *

  
  
"Sumia!? Where's Chrom? You were supposed to be paired up!" Robin shouts at the pegasus knight as she throws a javelin at the last remaining enemy knight that had his sword striking towards Robin before falling to the ground defeated. "Chrom is helping Olivia and Lissa at the moment a-and I thought.. since you're alone out here.." She mumbles almost shyly at Robin who quickly makes his way over to her.   
  
With a deep sigh he nods, his own sword in hand as he had used the last bits of his magic awhile back on the Valm enemy. "Ah, okay, thanks." He gestures towards the fallen knight on the ground before nodding towards the brunette, "I think the enemy is retreating for now but in the meantime stay close to me, we're going to head back since the battle had cleared a bit but it's still dangerous." Robin's eyes scan ahead to where the rest of Walheart's soldiers had stood with determination in their eyes before falling back.  
  
"Got it!" Sumia smiles at Robin with a cheerful voice as both start making their way back to regroup, the enemy will fight no matter what and will die here if they have too, which Robin wants to avoid all together for his own sanity. He's seen enough unnecessary slaughter that no one should be used to seeing.   
  
As they walk back both in idle chatter about flower fortunes to cooking then taking a nice long bath when they get back home and what not. "Oh! I can lend you this amazing book I found! It's a romantic and had me in tears near the end- Oh! I shouldn't spoil the ending for you." Sumia giggles to herself while clapping her hands together in front of her.  
  
Robin laughs along, "Chrom's very lucky to have you." He smiles at Sumia when she flushes and hides her face in her hands from embarrassment. "Wha- No! It's not just me, it's everyone too! Like you!" She giggles again before talking about every friend they had all made since the beginning.   
  
Protecting Sumia is is main concern at the moment, he has to protect her for Chrom.   
  
So when the sudden feeling of something flying past him, just barely grazing his skin if his cheek, Robin was unable to reflect the attack nor cut through it in time before the sickening sound of something getting pierced he whips his head to the side where Sumia had just been, he sees her falling backwards, a stream of blood flowing out of her and staining the ground around them when her body hits the ground.   
  
No..  
  
Her tears mixed with the blood from the wound on her head, bleeding out from under her hair, from the arrow that was meant for him. "R-Robin-" She tries to say, it hadn't killed her right away, just leaving her in pain for a few moments before another arrow flies past, killing her instantly.  
  
Robin stares down at Sumia's cold lifeless form on the battle field ground with horror, dread, fury, and a great pit of regret and shame. Shame that he had briefly felt happy just for a split second.  
  
Turning, Robin's eyes scan for the monster that had trampled and left this flower to die. Using the last bits of magic he had been saving for an emergency, he spots movement in the corner of his eyes and with rage, Robin strikes down the archer with lightning, leaving the smell of burnt flesh behind.   
  
"Sumia.." Robin whispers while falling to his knees and wiping the blood off Sumia's youthful face before closing her eyes. The sounds of metal armor clanking next to him, then Chrom's kneeling beside him while his fallen flower, his wife, Sumia lays there lifeless. He pulls her into his arms, Cradling her as sobs rack out of him.   
  
Robin sits there in silence while Chrom screams for the wife he'll never see again. "Chrom, I-" Robin tries to say anything but Chrom's voice cuts him off, "Leave." Chrom demands while he buries his face and Robin does so, standing then walking away without looking back.   
  
For Chrom, he'll leave and maybe it was out of his own selfishness too.  
  
Robin wakes up in that field with the lingering feeling of a broken heart. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if its not clear Robin sudokued at the end //sob  
> i have no idea where im going with this so ahh im just a sad boi//
> 
> also im sorry if i dont respnd to comments aahh i dont know to respond sometimes but thank you for the comments and thank you for reading!
> 
> edit: // so i know sudoku is a game and it was an inside joke, also along with the real meaning of seppuku but i didn't want to put the suicide word in or that he had killed himself for anyone uncomfortable with those words but just so i dont get any more comments about that//


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> have some fluff you guys

Going through the whole first part of the run is always so exhausting, a few times things had altered but over all it was the same, the same introduction, the same battle in south town, meeting Emmeryn, the kidnapping then heading to Regna Ferox when Gangrell calls out for war, this is very exhausting. Overall, it takes a few months for all of this to play out and no matter how much Robin knows about the up coming events, nothing he does can change how everything plays out.   
  
So this time Robin doesn't do anything to interfere with how things run, instead he clings to Chrom's side throughout these past few months, Chrom being Chrom didn't mind this and had warmed up to the the albino quickly when Robin had sparked the same interests as him, though Robin wound't lie and had used the past experiences to his advantage on forming a bond with the prince. Then soon they both had formed a deep friendship.   
  
Robin lets himself relax and not to stress over anything that's about to happen, he'll let someone else take care of things from here, though he'll still point them in the right direction here and there.   
  


* * *

  
  
"Have you seen snow before?" Chrom steps out of the warmth of the palace behind him as small puffs of air escapes from his lips while draping a heavier coat over the smaller's trembling form.   
  
"I have but, it always makes me happy to see fresh snow fall from the sky." Robin doesn't take his gaze off the night sky while snow gently falls around them both. "It is quite pretty, isn't it?" Chrom chuckles while standing next to Robin, taking his hand in his own. "You're freezing! How long have you been out here?" Chrom exclaims while taking both of Robin's hands into his own to warm them.   
  
"Aha.. er, well, I'm not sure actually." This time Robin takes his gaze off the sky to sheepishly smile at Chrom with flushed cheeks. Shaking his head Chrom just pulls the other closer to him while keeping Robin's hands in his own. "You're going to get sick like this."   
  
"You can take care of me then." Robin grins at Chrom who just huffs at that, "What am I? Your care taker?"   
  
"You'd be better then Fredrick, I'm sure of that." Robin laughs when Chrom shoves him away while his cheeks flush on their own. "Well, you'd have to listen to everything I say, and that means no scrolls or paper work during your rest." Chrom returns the grin at Robin's pout. "Yeah, yeah, fine." Robin waves his hand in dismissal before walking to the near by bench covered in a light sheet of snow then clearing a spot to sit. Chrom quickly joins him and both sit there hand in hand while watching the snow cover the land with it's white soft sheet.  
  


* * *

  
  
Robin can't help himself but feel giddy when he and Chrom run off to who knows where when they get a chance when Fredrick's attention isn't on them as they prepare for a meeting. Chrom's grip on his own hand never loosening as they run and duck into an unoccupied room in the back of the castle and hide behind some shelves while the muffled calls from Fredrick pass by.   
  
Panting, Robin lets out small fits of giggles when they both listen for anyone out side the room and know that no one is around. Chrom laughs with him as they both sit on the floor, exhausted from their sprint to get away and backs pressed against the wall. "I don't think I've ever ran that fast before," Chrom chuckles while catching his breath, "Nor have I pulled a stunt like this in awhile." Chrom finishes with a content sigh before looking at Robin.   
  
Robin smiles back at the prince, "I don't think I have either, well, not in a long time." Robin leans back against the wall still giggling here and there. "How long do you think it'll take for them to find us?' Robin's voice questions with a tilt of his head towards the prince next to him. "It'll probably be awhile but at least we have time to ourselves for now." Chrom's fingers twitch against Robin's own before both look at each other while tension fills the air.  
  
Almost shy, Chrom shifts closer to Robin while his fingers lace with his.   
  
"... May I-" Chrom flushes when Robin meets his gaze in the dim room, almost in shadows beside the small stream of light shining through the curtain from the window on a far wall. Robin averts his eyes, wny is he also feeling shy now too? He hasn't felt this shy in awhile and of course this isn't his first kiss with Chrom even though this would be the princes first with him.   
  
"You may." Robin whispers while turning his head back to Chrom who leans in too quickly causing them both to bump heads and groan out. "I'm so sorry! Gods, this is embarrassing.." Chrom quickly covers his face with a hand while Robin just laughs softly at him. "Don't worry." Robin leans in when Chrom removes his hand to focus his attention back on the albino.   
  
"Okay." Chrom mummers against Robin's lips when he gently presses them against his own.   
  


* * *

  
  
When he and Chrom sneak away from the group after making their way to a small little village to aid them when they had requested and had completed their work, both of them holding hands and small fits of laughter escape while they brush past some trees and bushes along side the path the group had taken back to Ylisstol to an opening filled with a bed of flowers scattered out.   
  
Chrom pulls Robin along, their fingers laced while they find an opening to sit down without trampling the flowers.  
  
"I'm glad we got away without anyone noticing." Chrom sighs in relief while Robin settles down next to him, "I'm pretty sure Lissa noticed," Robin chuckles, "She had started distracting Fredrick when we had pulled away." Chrom laughs along after Robin finishes. "Well, I should thank her later then."   
  
As both fall into a comfortable silence, Robin's eyes trail over the field of flowers, just being here with Chrom like this makes him happy, this closeness and the familiar nostalgic feeling, he hasn't felt this since long ago, to have this all to himself just for a bit longer, he wishes they could stay like this.  
  
Robin feels Chrom's gloved hand being placed on his own before lacing his fingers in between his own and holding lightly, closing his eyes when Chrom leans against him, the princes head resting onto his shoulder, if they can just stay like this.  
  
"Would you.. be willing to marry." Chrom breaks the silence while he turns his face away from Robin, his expression hidden from him while Robin sits there, staring.   
  
Marrying Chrom? Chrom's asking to marry? How long has it been since Robin had last heard those words? Had Chrom even asked his hand in marriage before? All those runs ago, Robin can't recall if Chrom had even asked or if it was his own selfishness memories diluting himself. He had wanted Chrom's affections to himself, he had wanted the way Chrom's loving smile and eyes filled with affection towards another on him.  
  
So when Chrom's eyes are on him, filled with affection and a softness to them, his smile that Robin's always loved seeing and would never stop loving, the way Chrom's face is flushed from ear to ear and the small nervous huff of laughter that escapes.  
  
Robin's own eyes fills with tears while his chest hurts from all the emotions he's feeling at the moment.   
  
"I- I-" Robin stutters, he can feel his own face heat when Chrom's whole attention is on him, gods, he's feeling shy now while he turns his head away, his heart beats rapidly while Chrom waits for his answer. "I.. I wouldn't be opposed to the thought of marriage." Robin doesn't think his face could flush even more when he looks back to the man in front of him, his eyes shine while that same goofy smile spreads across his face before pulling Robin closer and wrapping his arms around him in a warm embrace.   
  
"Wha-! Chrom we're going to fall-" Robin tries to warn before they fall back onto the ground.  
  
"I'm so glad, you don't know how happy I am right now." Chrom whispers into Robin's ear, resting his head in the crook of Robin's neck while Robin lays on top of him embarrassed, "I'm.. I'm happy too." And Robin means it, he's so happy in this moment with Chrom, maybe this time they could live happily together, maybe this had been what Robin's been trying so hard fore, to have a life with Chrom.   
  
"I love you." Robin whispers while propping himself onto his elbows hovering over Chrom and smiling down at him with teary eyes.  
  
"And I, you." The corners of Chrom's eyes crinkle along with his smile while he brings a hand up to wipe away at Robin's tears then gently caress his cheek.  
  
"Let's get married." Chrom's voice softly says while raising himself up to capture Robin's lips in his own.  
  
"Let's get married." Robin repeats, breathlessly laughing while tears fall.   
  


* * *

  
  
Someone had seen his brand, how could he be so careless, Robin feels so stupid for not covering it right away as dread washes over him.  
  
So when Chrom has summoned him to the throne room, heads turn his way as Fredrick escorts him to the front of the throne where Chrom stands with his back turned to them. Robin stands behind him with his head hung low, he can't face Chrom, not like this, if he can just explain himself..  
  
Robin had forgotten about his mark and identity completely until now, he had been too busy with this lovey dovey relationship with Chrom these past few months, how could he have forgotten this important fact about himself?  
  
"So you're Grima's vessel the Plegian's had rumored about." Chrom sounds defeated as the echo of boots drawing near where Robin stands with his head low. "And after all this time, you haven't told us? After we've.." Chrom doesn't finish the rest of his sentence, the heart break only audible to Robin.   
  
"No.. that's not.." Robin whispers as he backs away, eyes turn his way once again along with the whispers.  
  
"Show me your brand." Chrom's harsh words pierce through Robin's heart while he strides over and snatches a wrist in his strong grip. Robin flinches, his arm jerking back instinctually while he refuses to meet Chrom's gaze, why is this happening? Chrom wouldn't be angry at him for this right? Chrom's loving, caring, affectionate eyes wouldn't betray him, right? He's just angry at the fact that maybe that everyone is looking disgusted at them, no, just at Robin, right?  
  
When Robin raises his head to meet Chrom's eyes, he doesn't meet those loving, caring soft eyes looking back at him with reassurance, instead he sees the same disgust and hatred in those clear blue eyes directed at him as the hand around his wrist pulls forwards then his glove is being ripped off revealing the brand of Grima for all to see as it stares back with all six eyes along with everyone's gasps and whispers.  
  
Robin doesn't remember a time he's been afraid like he is right now, not when he's thrown himself in front of a blade to protect one of his friends or Chrom, not when he's had too many close calls and had felt the darkness creeping in to take him again to cradle him in it's cold clutches before throwing him back to the living to laugh and watch him struggle to live through this whole thing again, no, he did not fear death anymore.  
  
But the thought of Chrom hating him, despising him for having the brand of Grima staining his skin, Robin is afraid of what Chrom thinks of him and ending their friendship, relationship they've built in every run, would this change things in the next?  
  
Chrom must have noticed his fear, with the way Robin's body trembles and his expression surely reflecting his emotions. The hand holding onto his wrist lets go and Chrom pulls the smaller into a embrace as strong arms wrap and hold him there. "C-Chrom, I-I'm-" Robin tries to say but Chrom quickly cuts him off, "I'm sorry."  
  
Silence.  
  
"Why..?" Robin whispers while he tears up as a stabbing pain throughout his backside starts to sear through his entire body. The strong taste of iron in his mouth as he coughs, blood trailing down one of the corners as he stares up at Chrom's cold gaze before slumping against him. His vision is starting to blur while Robin goes through the stages of dying again, even if he doesn't fear death it's still a hassle to go through the familiar feeling of his body bleeding out, the hazyness, gods Robin hates the feeling of his body feeling so weak as his life drains and the coldness sweeping over, he's so tired of this.  
  
"..." Chrom doesn't say anything, silent as Robin falls to the floor when his grip on him lets go.   
  
Robin blinks, the tears staining the floor while his eyes underneath his bangs meets Chrom's again, a smile forms onto his face and with enough energy left he rasps out, "Damn you." Then the world goes black once again.  
  
Robin wakes up in that field with the phantom pain of his closest friend stabbing him in the back.


	4. Chapter 4

Robin feels like he's going insane.  
  
The second he had open his eyes he had felt empty, miserable and so lifeless. Chrom and Lissa both shared concern looks with one another before deciding that maybe Robin had been attacked and needed urgent care, even Fredrick seemed to be concerned when Robin lacked any response to his questioning.  
  
Robin idly followed them to south town where the small village was getting raided like all the other times, Lissa staying back with Robin as Chrom and Fredrick run off to fight off the brigands.  
  
"W-Wha! Someone help me!" Lissa screeches when that one familiar figure laughs with his axe swung high in the air to strike her. Robin lets his body to move, to cast magic at the brigand then watch the body fall to the ground. How much more can he do this?  
  
"Thank you so much!" Lissa cries while heading over to him, Robin knows she's going to embrace him, smile up at him with those same bright eyes as Chrom and Emmeryn, Chrom and Fredrick will both come over to also thank him and the rest will play out.  
  
So Robin snaps.   
  
Lissa's scream didn't even make it out before the familiar sticky substance of blood splatters across his face and and coat. The familiar bolt of lightning in his hand while he presses deep into her chest, pressing it harder and harder into her while blood soaks his hands then he's shoved face first onto the ground, a choke hold around his neck from the great knight.  
  
Chrom's screaming and sobbing. Robin laughs as tears fall from his face and onto the blood soaked ground from Lissa's corpse.   
  
Then a swing of an axe later, Robin's world goes black one more before he wakes up in that damn field again.   
  
He smears the ground with blood again and the pleas from Lissa as she cowers away from him, from Robin who had fought with Fredrick and snapped his neck while Chrom is unconscious near by, no, Robin can't hurt Chrom no matter what, even if Chrom had broken his heart too many times, even after all that they've been through, even after Chrom had looked at him in disgust. Robin wouldn't hurt him.   
  
Then there's a stabbing pain in his back when Falchion is pierced through his body while he falls to the ground, this is a familiar feeling, a feeling Robin knows too well before he wakes up in the same goddamn field.   
  
Stop it.  
  
When Robin stands he lunges himself at Fredrick's ready axe everytime they meet and-  
  
Robin laughs and cries when Chrom's confused gaze sets on him once more before casting magic and in incinerating himself in fire.   
  
This time he sees long blue hair and this is all wrong again while a voice calls out in the distance, "Lucina! Wha-" Robin doesn't even care anymore as he rips the Falchion from this person's side and stabs himself with it.  
  
Make it stop.  
  
Robin doesn't bother waiting for Chrom and Lissa to wake him, instead he runs.  
  
Runs and runs, to the dragon's table.  
  
He remembers that place, maybe his fate is to become the fell dragon. Robin can't take this anymore, he's doesn't even remember what number he's on, he had stopped counting after the hundredth time. He'd take that instead of living through this, if he becomes the fell dragon he can live for eternity, immortal, no one can stop him and he can destroy everything until he's the last one left.  
  
But fate is cruel.  
  
Chrom is there at the borders that split Ylisse and Plegia, a battle had formed from brigands, these damn brigands.  
  
Robin wants to laugh and cry once more, but he doesn't. Instead he fights through the battle, using anything and anyone to get through, to get pass and to the dragon's table.   
  
Robin's grip on Chrom's back as he drags the prince across the battlefield, pressing a dagger to his neck and hissing out that he's holding the prince hostage and sneering at the Plegian's to tell them to fuck off while he passes through with the prince across the border and only that as he refuses to actually hurt him, he just needs Chrom to get pass into the desert then he'll let him go without any harm  
  
"You're free to go, leave." Robin doesn't even glance at Chrom as he shoves him to the desert floor, he can't look at him, he refuses to look at the prince who he had just kidnapped. Chrom stumbles in the sand before coughing and positioning himself to his knees.  
  
"W-Why.." Chrom chokes out before looking up at his kidnapper, he had been stripped of any weapons and only had his clothes and armor on him.  
  
"... Pray you make it out alive." Robin laughs, he's losing it. Then he takes off, leaving Chrom alone in the heating desert.   
  


* * *

  
Robin wonders what would happen if he let Grima take over, he knows he's the vessel for the fell dragon after that time with Chrom, after he had stabbed him and watched him die right in front of him with cold eyes. Robin wouldn't let himself forget after that, he can't go through that again.  
  
What is the point in even trying anymore? He can't change anything, even if he does it will come back even more horrible then the original.   
  
So when he stands in front of the dragon's table Robin hears a low chuckle from the shadows that almost sound like his own voice. "I see, given up?" The shadows around him taunt while Robin climbs the stairs, he's tried, he's tired of all of this.  
  
"If you give in without much resistance, I'll help you." His own voice echos in his ears while he tilts his head up to look at the red stain glass atop the tower before closing his eyes to let go.  
  
He lets go.  
  
"Please, please make it stop." Robin's voice cracks in the silence as he falls to his knees, "Make it stop!" He screams out while slamming his fists onto the marble floor, tears falling now as he cries, he can't take this anymore.   
  
He must have finally lost it when he sees his own reflection standing there in front of him.   
  
Peering down with those blood red eyes with amusement. His reflection smiles down at him before speaking again, "If you let me in, I can make it stop, it must be tiring to live like this, though from my point of view it does get tiring after awhile to see you fall so many times." Grima says while chuckling at Robin's pitiful state before pulling him up back onto his feet. "So what do you say?" Grima looks at Robin almost bored.  
  
"End it." Robin whispers into the silence.  
  
He lets Grima in, he lets Grima take over, he watches as Grima destroys everything around him and he watches when Chrom who had made it out alive and had prepared to slay the fell dragon with a blessing from Naga, watched as Chrom desperately try to cling onto hope and his bonds before he also falls victim to death by Grima's hands while the dragon laughs, along with all the others Robin has come to know.   
  
Then,  
  
Robin wakes up in that field once again with tired eyes and the faintest cackles of Grima laughing at his suffering. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> not much this chapter just robin having a mental breakdown  
> the suffering never stops _(:3」∠)_ 
> 
> thanks for reading so far lmao this was just for my to put my stress out somewhere but thanks again for the comments aahh it makes me happy to read them


	5. Chapter 5

Robin's so very tired.   
  
But he doesn't let the stress get to him that much unlike the other time, he had already let out most of the horrible sinister thoughts and actions out a few rounds ago and doesn't even want to remember those memories of his friends with their broken bodies dead on the floor while the madness in him cackles at the mess he had made.  
  
Especially Chrom.   
  
He doesn't want to remember how he had broken Chrom.  
  
But that doesn't mean he doesn't let the tiredness slip out at times, maybe it's unsympathetic to others when he brushes off the other's concerns about the up coming battle with Gangrell, a wave of his hand in dismissal while he doesn't write much of the plan to defeat the mad king. In truth it's only because in each run they do the same old plan, Emmeryn dies either way and they kill off the king.   
  
Robin's very tired of this all.   
  
"... Robin, may we speak?" Robin can feel Chrom's concern gaze on the back of his head while he briefly writes down notes in the same old book he's always carried around. He knows that he should at least pretend he's doing work after all.   
  
"What is it?" He doesn't mean the tone of voice he uses towards the prince, it just had slipped out on it's own. Maybe the stress is getting to him, hell, he already know's the stress is eating at him already but he doesn't bother fixing it, how can he even fix it?   
  
"I think you are unwell.." Chrom starts and Robin just laughs quietly at that, yes he is unwell, who would have known.  
  
"You think so? I would have never guessed it myself." He bitterly mumbles to himself while the quill in his hands almost cracks under the pressure of his hand that squeezes tightly around it. God he want's to stab himself with the sharp edge of it and be done with this.   
  
"... Uh, If you are stressed over this I can get another to take over while you rest." The prince's tone sickens Robin, his gaze burns into the wooden desk and wonders if he should just burn this whole damn camp down, what's the point in trying to save Emmeryn and ending the war? Why can't they all just leave him alone?  
  
Because he's weak for Chrom and will always be, damn him.  
  
"No Chrom." Robin bitterly spats, no one knows how things will play out besides him, he's the only one who can lead everyone out of this alive, well, besides Emmeryn of course. He hears Chrom let out a frustrated sigh before walking over around Robin to the other side of the wooden desk and his narrowed eyes stare down at Robin.  
  
Robin might have been intimidated but it's just Chrom, he can't do anything to harm him.   
  
"Why bother working? You clearly aren't interested in planning the rescue and your mood is affecting the rest of us and-" Robin doesn't bother letting Chrom finish the rest of his rant, not when his own frustration is at it's peak and he lets it all spill over.  
  
"You know why? Because I know that we can't save your sister, I know how we'll end Gangrell and that won't bring her back. We'll lose your precious friends if I let you let someone else work on the plan and I already know how things will go down in the end. I've been trying for so long to save your damn sister and you don't even know the amount of times I tried so many different outcomes to save her so shut the hell up and let me think about how I can save her this time." Robin doesn't notice how he shakes in his seat or how hard he's breathing while Chrom stands there with his mouth agape and wide eyed in shock at what he just yelled out at him.   
  
The room is silent and it's Chrom who speaks up first.  
  
"... I'm sorry." Chrom says after a few silent moments had passed, he doesn't look at him and Robin almost feels bad about his out burst but instead he turns his gaze away from the man in front of him.   
  
Robin wants to laugh again, this isn't even Chrom's fault and he's the one apologizing, he hates him sometimes for being like this.   
  
"I hate you." Robin whispers to himself when Chrom leaves the tent to let him continue brood in his own thoughts alone.   
  
If he's talking about himself or Chrom, he doesn't know.   
  


* * *

  
Robin knows it's cruel to leave not knowing if Emmeryn had survived or not from the amount of wind magic he and the rest of the mages in the group had used, but they still had a battle to finish.   
  
"Chrom!" Robin shouts while dodging the lightening that had flashed through the sword at Gangrell's hands, even if they had their differences and had fought earlier Robin can at least count of Chrom to follow his orders out on the battlefield.   
  
"Nngh!" Chrom swings his sword with all his strength then quickly backs away when Robin's own magic scatter around the mad king, trapping him in place for Chrom to strike the final blow.   
  
"You think you've won? Ha! Don't be cocky!" Gangrell cackles before readying himself for the next attack.   
  
It's when Robin pulls out his own levin sword out and prints towards the mad king that catches the man off guard and parried his attack, leaving his back open to Chrom who quickly takes this chance to stab his sword through the king.  
  
"Damn you-!" Gangrell cries out before he falls and Robin doesn't even mind the blood that soaks his front from the king on the ground. He doesn't acknowledge the cold glare from Gangrell before he falls limp and like all the other times his men flee the battleground when the king falls.   
  
"Robin- You're.." Chrom reaches out but Robin merely shakes his head. "Don't bother. We have important things to worry about right now." He turns to scan the area, their own men don't look as bad as they should be nor seriously injured and he's almost proud that their healers are already on the job while they round up and start to heal up the members of their army.  
  
Chrom moves closer to the body on the ground, his sword still clenched tight in his grip as he stares down at the man with hatred.  
  
Robin know's how he feels, he truly does but what's done is done now.   
  
"Chrom, that's enough." Robin moves to stand next to the prince.  
  
"I just.. I cannot forgive him after what he had done to Emm.." Chrom's shoulders shake and Robin can understand how he feels too even if the prince doesn't know.   
  
"You don't have to forgive him but there's nothing we can do now." Robin averts his gaze, he speaks the truth when he says this, there's nothing they can do now until Robin himself is thrown back into his world to try again, he knows he'll go through this again.  
  
"There are still things we need to do-" Robin turns his head to the side when he feels Chrom lean against him.  
  
"I'm glad you're with me." Chrom sighs while resting his head against the others shoulder. "I'd be lost without you and probably be dead too." He chuckles to himself tiredly without moving away from Robin. He can't comfort him, he doesn't try too but having Chrom leaned against him almost makes him feel warm again.   
  
So they stand there like that until Chrom is ready to move on.

  
"Maybe there's still hope- Maybe she had survived!" Chrom desperately clings onto the hope for his sister when they had returned to try and recover Emmeryn's body after they had slayed Gangrell, Robin doesn't acknowledge the numbness that had always been inside of him whenever this event plays out, he's seen and lived through this too many times now. Even as he watches Chrom and Lissa sob over the loss of their elder sister, the rest of the Shepard's soon joining in, Robin can't cry even if he tries to force it out.   
  
He must look inhuman to anyone who spares a glance towards him, but no one can understand how much he had worked to save her from this cruel fate.   
  
It was hours of searching that they had finally stopped and started to pack up and head back to Ylisstol, even after the cruel words Robin had spat at the prince he still smiled, even if it didn't reach his eyes, at Robin and would ask him to company him throughout the march back to the castle.   
  
Robin finds himself in Chrom's personal tent at nights, even if he's fighting himself and his feelings Robin lets the comforting words spill out of his mouth while the prince sobs into his arms. He's done this too many times already, the words just naturally form while he stares blankly at the tent flaps.   
  
"Chrom, don't worry about everyone else, you have to think about yourself right now." Robin can feel Chrom lean against his shoulder and rests his head onto him. "But.. I have-" Chrom tiredly mumbles out then a sob escapes while his arms wrap tightly around Robin.  
  
His heart-wrenching sobs aches throughout Robin's cold state while he lets Chrom cry out all his feelings like he had done in every time.   
  
"I'm so- I'm so sorry." Chrom chokes out through his sobs into Robin's shoulder. "I-I should have d-done more.." Robin remembers how Chrom had told him how he felt, it never changes of how regret fills the princes chest while his whole body trembles. He, Lissa and Emmeryn could have spent so much more time together as a family and now she's gone, just like that. He wasn't ready for this, he wasn't ready to lose his sister like this and she didn't deserve the way she had gone.   
  
His grip tightens while he sobs out again and Robin doesn't mind, even if they spend the whole night like this he allows Chrom to use him how ever he wants.  
  
When Chrom calms it had already been a few hours into the night and he's left even more tired then earlier while he rests against Robin, who's fingers had found themselves in the princes hair, stroking calmly despite fighting the urge to leave.  
  
He's tired of this.  
  
Chrom leans tiredly against Robin, his arms still wrapped around him as he mumbles out. "Can you.. Will you stay the night?"   
  
Robin stays quiet for a moment before he nods and shifts, he doesn't want to stay. "Yes."   
  


* * *

  
"We're almost back to the castle, finally, I'm exhausted." Chrom sighs in relief next to Robin as they walk up the streets of Ylisstol, the castle in view as they near closer and closer. Robin nods, he should feel grateful that they're almost back but he can't, not when he had failed this time again.   
  
"I'm sure we're all exhausted." Chrom rambles on next to him, if he's noticed Robin's silence he doesn't comment on it nor acknowledges it. Robin's own dull eyes trail up at the castle walls when they near the gates, he's so tired and exhausted maybe locking himself in the room he resides in wouldn't be so bad and the thought of plopping into his bed after being away from it's comfort for so long, he can hardly wait to get back now.  
  
"We should celebrate, for everyone's hard work." And Chrom is still rambling on next to him, the prince nods to himself while smiling and Robin can't help but to crack a small smile. Chrom is still trying so hard right now and look at him, he wishes he had Chrom's strength.  
  
When they've finally reached the castle gates, Chrom's eyes widen in disbelief and his mouth is agape while he stares ahead then he and Lissa are running and Robin's own eyes trail after them and he swears his own heart is going to stop.  
  
As Emmeryn stands there, embraced in a tight hug with Chrom and Lissa before greeting the rest of the army back wit open arms and the same gentle smile on her face, standing there alive and breathing, Robin nearly cries out in relief. The knowing fact that they had finally saved her, he had finally kept his promise to Chrom all those loops ago.   
  
"Emm, you're.." Chrom sniffles and smiles all the same as she embraces him once again along with a sobbing Lissa at her other side. "I am glad you two are safe," Emmeryn whispers to her younger siblings with tears of her own pooling at the corner of her eyes before looking ahead at the rest and smiles. "I am glad you all are safe and are home now."   
  
They are all finally home now.   
  
"It's thanks to you, your hard work paid off." Robin hears Chrom say to him when he had pulled away from his sisters to stand next to him. "My hard work paid off.." He repeats to himself quietly, Chrom doesn't even know how deep his words mean to him, after all this time.  
  
When Chrom's smile is directed towards him and embraces him into his warm arms, Robin feels his chest ache and his eyes burn with tears that threaten to fall. This feeling in his chest, the small fragment that he had been holding onto since the promise he had made to Chrom long ago even as he had fallen into madness and back to his senses, all that he has suffered through.   
  
Robin returns a smile of his own while tears fall, this time it is pure joy, happiness, relief, rid of all the guilt and self-hatred he had for himself, blaming himself for not trying harder to save his sister from the cruel fate of death.   
  
Maybe there is hope.   
  
The fact that they had saved Emmeryn, that she's alive and well, breathing, he is filled with a feeling of hope that maybe he can change things after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> me: *crying while writing this chapter*


	6. Chapter 6

The celebration that night had gone all out, though Robin slips out of the banquet hall when no one is looking and steadily makes his way to the courtyard where the garden is to escape the chaos that the Shepard's had planned out for the night.   
  
"Something is going to happen." Robin knows his mood had been lifted a bit but the fear that something horrible will happen still lingers in his thoughts.   
  
When he steps out into the night he is hit with the familiar scent of the flowers that are bloomed to their fullest scattered throughout the courtyard. Breathing the fresh air of the night sky while carefully making his way through the flowers, now that he thinks about it the garden never changes throughout the runs, staying the same as always when he comes back here to admire the blossoms or to be alone, he can appreciate this place.   
  
"How'd I know to find you out here?" Robin doesn't turn to the voice instead he smiles at the warmth it gives him throughout his chest.   
  
"You always know where to find me." Chrom lets out a small huff of laughter before standing next to Robin. They both stand there in content silence while the sounds of the part continuing on in the background fills the air.   
  
Robin covers his yawn with a hand, he's physically and mentally tired from all of this, he can't wait to just lay down in bed and forget for awhile before he's thrown into a horrible accident or maybe something terrible will occur later on in the up coming months, he'd have to start from the beginning once again.   
  
He's used to it though.   
  
"Shall we sit?" Chrom breaks Robin from out of his miserable thoughts and gestures towards the same old bench near by once he had finished yawning. Chrom is as ever so kind to him that it's almost painful.   
  
"Oh, sure." Robin yawns again before following Chrom's lead as they move to the bench to sit.   
  
Even if the night is peaceful Robin can't help to worry about the future and what will transpire, he's not ready to move on from this happy moment that they have saved Emmeryn and face the cruel ways of Walheart when the two years pass by. Or maybe something will happen within these two years, either way Robin wishes that they could all stay how things are at the moment.   
  
"... Robin?" Robin turns his gaze towards Chrom when he speaks, the prince himself isn't looking at him but ahead at seemingly nothing while his hands fist and unfist on his laps, oh, he's about to say something important. Robin knows the signs by heart now.   
  
"Yes Chrom?" He watches Chrom fumble some more before their eyes meet, he smiles encouragingly at his friend to continue even though he's tired and just wants to go to his own chambers to sleep the rest of the two years away.   
  
"I- uh,this is rather embarrassing to say out loud now that I think about it.." Chrom chuckles to himself while scratching at his head nervously.   
  
Robin can feel his heart beats in agitation, this could go two ways and he doesn't want to think about the latter. It's too early for confessions. A confession for him or for another.   
  
"I- We're two half's of the same whole. I can't see anyone else I'd rather spend my life with besides you-" Chrom flushes a bright pink while his hands fumble with each other again. Even if this confession is for him, Robin can't help but think that what Chrom is saying is a lie, he thinks about the many times Chrom had spent his life with another in the other times and even if Chrom thinks this way now, says this to him, it's not true at all.   
  
"..."   
  
"So, I.. Gods, If you would, may we.. court?" Chrom flushes more at the lack of response from Robin at his side. His hands fly up and shake while he rambles. "I mean- If you don't want to- We can pretend I didn't say anything!" The prince is quick to quiet when Robin just smiles back at him.   
  
It's too early for confessions, Robin repeats to himself. He doesn't deserve this from Chrom, not after how he's been acting towards him, towards everyone. But even through all of their bickering in these past few months, his heart beats painfully in his chest for Chrom.   
  
This painful feeling of wanting Chrom all to himself, the painful feeling of all the heart breaks, the painful feeling of watching him marry another. Chrom doesn't know what he's talking about when he says he wants to spend the rest of his life with him. Two half's of the same whole, how many times had he heard Chrom say that to him? At this point ut has no feeling behind it anymore.  
  
But even with these feelings, he can't say no to Chrom. It's Chrom who had been there most of the time and now that he thinks about it, all he can remember is Chrom, Chrom from the very beginning. He can't throw these feeling away even if he tried.  
  
"I have to confess something." Robin doesn't turn to Chrom, he's not ready for the heartbreak or the rejection that surely has to come when he shows Chrom what lays under his glove, but, he needs to tell Chrom before anyone else.   
  
"What is it?" Chrom's gentle voice makes Robin's chest ache again, he's always been gentle to Robin before any betrayals.   
  
"I've kept a secret from you and everyone else." Robin's fingers trail over the fabric of his right hand where he knows the mark lays, before Chrom could ask what is wrong, Robin turns his head to face the prince, he needs to know how Chrom will react.  
  
"I-I," He hesitates for a moment, he doesn't even know what he's doing anymore. "I am the fell dragon, I am Grima." Robin breathes out, he doesn't know that he's trembling in agitation, or maybe it's fear but either way he waits.  
  
He waits for Chrom to react, he waits for Chrom too look disgusted at him, to hate him, to tell him to leave, anything really. But none of that comes, instead Chrom just smiles like nothing Robin had said even mattered.  
  
"I'm glad I've met you," Chrom's gentle gaze is set on him once again and the beating of Robin's heart quickens to where he knows this will lead too, he's been blessed before to hear these words come from the prince in front of him.   
  
"So when I say that, we're two half's of the same whole I mean it with everything, so.." Chrom trails off and Robin swears his heart will stop in his chest when Chrom stands and kneels in front of him with flushed cheeks and his same goofy smile on his face.  
  
"Even if you say that we can't because of your mark or who you are, that doesn't change how I feel about you." Chrom gently holds Robin's marked hand and slips it off before continuing his speech. "I still love you for who you are."  
  
On one of his knees in front of Robin, Chrom brings his hand to hold Robin's own in his while a thumb rubs over the marked skin. "If you would, I'd love to have your hand in marriage." Chrom's smile meets his eyes, full of love and affection for the one in front of him, for Robin.  
  
Robin remembers all the bad more then the good memories that he's lived through, each one with Chrom in them. Chrom the person he cherishes to death, Chrom who has broken him and repaired in in other runs, Chrom who has always been there even if they've been distant towards each other in some and other times they've grown close. Chrom will always have a spot in Robin's heart forever.   
  
"Yes." Is all Robin can say through tears and smiles down at Chrom who kisses his hand that brands the mark of Grima.   
  
Robin allows himself to be happy and cherishes this moment while he doesn't worry about the future events for now.   
  


* * *

  
Robin can't believe the whole war with Walheart was avoided all together with Emmeryn's help, he doesn't know how she did it but he's grateful to her. The Emperor had calmed and the Con's were also grateful for the war that had been cleared out with some counseling.   
  
They had lived in peace for another year until news of the Plegian's were rumored to be resurrecting the fell dragon with sinister actions in mind were true.   
  
"They can't really resurrect a big o'l dragon can they?" Lissa wonders while the Shepard's marh to Plegia to speak with the new king on behalf of Emmeryn's request. "Uh.. I'm not sure how that'll work out." Chrom's eyes flicker to Robin then to Lissa, Robin himself doesn't speak, he know's its possible even without him being there but if they wanted the peace to continue, Robin will try his damn best.   
  
When they settle for the night and all in their tents, Robin can't ignore the concern looks Chrom is sending his way when they ready to sleep. "Chrom please, I'm fine, stop worrying so much." Robin sits on the cot while his attention is on Chrom who just sheepishly smiles back at him before joining his husband in the bed. "I know, I just.." Chrom's own hand tails over to hold at Robin's marked hand while rubbing circles atop. "I'm worried about you." He rests his head against Robin's shoulder while pulling the smaller close.   
  
With a sigh, Robin's hands find themselves combing through Chrom's blue locks while leaning against him. "Don't worry, I'll be fine, they can't actually do anything to me." Robin had learnt how to keep his body under control since the last time, he doesn't even want to remember the horrors of that last run.   
  
"..." Chrom doesn't say anything as both sit there in the comfort of their tent, Robin's about to nod off when Chrom speaks again, "I'll protect you no matter what." He lifts his head to place a kiss on Robin's lips while pulling them onto the bed and under the covers.   
  
"And I will too." Robin yawns while snuggling closer to Chrom before sleep takes them both.

* * *

"Damn it!" Robin curses under his breath, of course this wouldn't have ended well, it basically had the word trap written all over it when they had decided to try and talk peace with the king, Validar.  
  
Even if this is his father, Robin will take him down along with all his plans, at least they had interfered before the ritural couold had started.   
  
"Where are we?" Chrom flicks his gaze between Robin at his side then at Validar across from them. "This is the dragon's table, he had warped his here." Robin calmly replies without taking his eyes off Validar. "The dragon's table?" Chrom's grip on his sword tightens as Validar cackles before throwing his hands out. "Yes, we are at the dragon's table, here I can complete the ritual as I need the vessel and sacred blood." Validar's eyes scan over Robin then at Chrom with a grin.   
  
"I won't let you lay a finger on Robin." Chrom declares while raising his sword in defense, "We'll see about that." Validar sneers before his fingers light up with dark magic. "Chrom follow my lead!" Robin shouts while casting his own magic to clash with Validar's.   
  
Robin won't let Validar ruin what they had worked so hard fore, what he had worked so hard for, a world where peace had finally settled, where everyone had survived until the end.   
  


The battle against the king of Plegia was a long and exhausting one.

  
  
' _Just a little bit more_.. _!_ ' Robin breathes as brown amber eyes scan the area as Validar cackles like a madman with his own magic sparking at his fingertips.   
  
Chrom is struggling to stand as the hit from earlier had seriously injured his side where torn burnt fabric lays.  
  
"I shall end your pitiful existence now." Validar says while raising a hand in the air in front of him and Robin feels his heart quicken in fear for Chrom's safety. He has to try it now, he knows that there is some dark power of Grima in him, he's used it before but it almost scares him at the thought of using Grima's power.   
  
But it's when Validar points his fingers at Chrom that Robin decides to use the power of the fell dragon.  
  
"VALIRDAR!" Robin shouts at the man, his own hand rising in the air while purple smoke starts to raise from his own fingertips before powerful dark magic ignites. "You-!" The man didn't even finish his sentence as the purple flames cover him while he screams in agony before falling to the ground.  
  
Panting hard, Robin almost feels himself fall to the ground before a pair of arms are holding him up, then he's leaning against Chrom's chest as the man is almost covered in concern at Robin's state and well being.   
  
"Robin, are you okay?" Chrom as ever is gentle as he says this, Robin nods while he closes his eyes for a moment while mumbling out. "I need.. I need a minute."   
  
He feels Chrom nod and they stand like that for a moment before Robin slightly sways before straightening and speaking again. "I'm okay now." He opens his eyes and meets Chrom's gaze with a smile.   
  
"You're okay.. Don't scare me like that." Chrom pulls him close once again and Robin can't help but laugh a little at Chrom's concern. "I'm sorry, I won't do that ever again."   
  
"What was that magic? I've never seen you use that before." Chrom's questioning gaze is on him again. "I mean, it saved us and had ended the king on impact."   
  
"... It's hard to explain but, just think of it as a powerful last resort dark magic." Robin doesn't feel like explaining the whole truth to Chrom, well, not now at least.   
  
"Ah, okay. Well.. We did it." Chrom smiles down at him while he squeezes him in his arms. Robin smiles brightly up at Chrom too, yes they did it, now they can finally rest in peace.   
  
"Chrom!" Robin shouts when he sees black smoke form from behind and then-  
  
Robin doesn't even know what had happened. It was a blur of events, he had shoved Chrom out of the way and soon there was a flash of lightening, the burning feeling in his gut as he cries out in pain then he's falling to the ground.  
  
"ROBIN!!" Robin can barely hear Chrom's voice through the ringing in his ears and, gods, he's in so much pain right now. He doesn't even noticed that Chrom is kneeling next to him, holding him in his arms while tears form in the Exalts eyes.  
  
"Damn you!" Robin thinks he hears through the ringing, he's laying on the ground now and he knows that there's a fight going on in the background but he just lays there, helplessly in pain.   
  
' _I'm dying._ ' Robin's eyes stare blankly ahead of him before trailing down to the blood that soaks the marble floor underneath him, this familiar grasp of death as it washes over him as the feeling of his body weakening once again. The dull pain where the bolt had been stabbed into him doesn't hurt as much anymore.   
  
But as he lays there dying, it's taking longer for death to take him and he knows its impossible by the amount of blood that soaks the ground, his own blood.   
  
So why is it taking so long for death to take him?   
  
Robin tries to focus his hazy vision on blurred figures of Chrom in the distant battling with Validar.   
  
is this some cruel joke? Forced to watch while he slowly dies in his own pool of blood while Chrom and Validar fight on for peace or for the end of this world?   
  
Robin feels tears pooling at the corner of his eyes, it's not for the fact that he's afraid of dying, he's not afraid to die anymore. It's from the knowing fact that he can't do anything to help. Tears of frustration that he is here, forced to watch this battle, of being so useless.  
  
Why is this happening?  
  
'C-Chrom.' Robin desperately tries to call out but he can't even muster up the energy to speak. His vision is slowly starting to become hazy and he can barely make out the shape of Chrom in the distance as he starts to mix and blur into the background along with the darken figure of Validar.   
  
Even the sounds Chrom's sword clashing against the marble ground and the sizzling cracks of fire being scattered around sounds far off in the distance, almost like he's not even there.   
  
"..." Robin closes his eyes, it's useless to even try knowing that he can't do anything for Chrom, so let him sleep until he goes numb, until he wakes up feeling the sun on his face once again, the grass almost tickling him as it sways in the wind and the two familiar forms of his friends peering down at him so that he can live through this hell all over again.   
  
"Nngh..!"  
  
Robin's eyes snap open when he hears the pained cry from Chrom and Validar cackling like a madman while the room is filled with static.   
  
Chrom's white cape is stained with blood while Falchion falls to the marble floor clattering. In that moment, when their eyes meet for a split second but it feels like they're in slow motion as Chrom smiles at him, with all the love in the world and Robin can almost hear the last words he had said to him long ago, but it feels like it had just been freshly burned into his mind.   
  
"This isn't your fault."   
  
"C-Chrom..!" Robin struggles to move, he needs to get to Chrom even as he's on the brink of death himself, even as every inch of his body is screaming at him to not move, the burning sensation throughout his whole being hurts so much and even how his muscles feel like they're going to give in from how exhausted and numb his limbs feel.   
  
He needs to get to Chrom no matter what.   
  
Robin doesn't even care if Validar is sneering at them, his taunts and cruel laughter isn't acknowledged as he takes one of Chrom's limp hand in his own and holds onto it like he would come back, that he's still alive.   
  
Chrom didn't deserve this, why was Chrom the one that had died first?   
  
"Chrom.." Robin chokes out while more tears form, they had almost made it, where did it all go wrong?  
  
He hears Validar move in the background, his cackles fill the room as he nears them. Robin closes his eyes, this cruel world won't take him. He'll reset this damn world once again.  
  
He will end it here.  
  
"I WON'T LET YOU WIN! I'LL END IT HERE!" He screams out, the sheer rawness in his voice makes Validar flinch back while his voice echoes across the whole room before it's interrupted by the force of an explosion so powerful it leaves debris crumbling into ashes as the flames burn and destroy everything in it's deathing range.  
  
Robin had felt it's warm grasp surrounding him and Chrom, it had felt so peaceful, almost like the flames were a soft embrace unlike the cold choking grip of death.  
  
' _This soft warm feeling_..' Robin closes his eyes with a smile.  
  
It reminds him of the sun kissing his face while laying in that field, of Chrom's bright smiles and laughter when they would spend time together, of Emmeryn's soft voice and gentle smile when they get the chance to speak to one another, of the way Lissa would get a mischievous glint in her eyes when she had come up with a new prank and all the fun memories he had with his friends.   
  
This time, he smiles with all the love for his friends and for Chrom while he lets the flames engulf him whole.   
  
...  
  
' _Maybe I'm meant to suffer_.' Robin blinks, eyes squinting while his vision focuses on the two hovering figures peering down at him as he lays in the grass that almost tickles his skin as it sways in the wind and the sun kissing his face. Lissa's wears a concern expression on his right and Chrom had his usual bright caring smile on his face to his left and Fredrick standing guard in the distance.  
  
"Here, take my hand."   
  
And the loop starts again. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> that's it, its done *crying face* this is so sad im sorry for ending it as it is but not everyone has a happy ending ya'know   
> i wanted to have 6 chapters for some reason too lol 
> 
> I finished this in a month i am proud of myself   
> thanks for reading my what i call 'shitty fanfic' aha and thanks for all the comments too, it really helped me to finish this, knowing that people liked it so far, i hope my writing wasn't too bad T v T)b


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